It's cold and rainy, and I'm feeling a bit like I would rather be living anyone else's life at the moment. So here are some Deep Thoughts from Saturday Night Live (remember when that show used to be funny?) to brighten my, and perhaps your, day...

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say."That's dynamite, baby."

I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to see more and more planets fall under the ruthless domination of our solar system.

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.

And here's one with Halloween in mind :)
Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of it's head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.

Alright, now I'm going to go back to more important things. Like staring out the window of my office at cars driving by. And wet pavement. And ferns. mmm...

-A